Golfing Terms of the Day


An Adolf Hitler - taking two shots in a bunker

An Arthur Scargill - a great strike but a poor result

A Kate Winslett - a bit fat but otherwise perfect

A Rodney King - over-clubbed

An O.J. Simpson - somehow got away with it

A Condom - safe but didn't feel quite right

A sister-in-law - up there, but I know that I shouldn't be

A Paula Radcliffe - ugly but a good runner

A Kate Moss - a bit thin

Taking a Gerry Adams - hitting a provisional

A Diego Maradonna - a nasty little five footer

A Salman Rushdie - an impossible read

A Rock Hudson - thought it was straight, but it wasn't

A ladyboy - Looks like an easy hole but all may not be what it seems

A nipple licker - a shot that opens up the hole

A gynaecologist's assistant - just shaved the hole

Private Parts